I'm sitting on my floor in the midst of cleaning, fighting my mind.
I planned last night to get myself cleaned and organized this weekend, so I could implement my plan I have in place to make sure that I can spend time with my family....
And it starts....
You're not going to get this done.
You aren't capable of having a clean home
You're so unorganized
It's too much ...
I am CONSTANTLY in fight with my mind, and I could scream. It's suffocating, it's distracting. Even as I right this my brain wonders back to the same thoughts.
I sit here, with my almost finished bed, i am making the decision to try again.
To get up, to remind myself of where I came from, and to keep fighting.
even though I want to scream
Even though I want to throw things around the room and release, because that's whaf I have done in the past, that's what I usually do to fight my brain, I'm going to rise, I'm going to get up, I'm going to finish my chores, and continue to fight prove myself wrong.
Because I can.
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